But I know that by telling Magpie about what happened, it... well.
I was in terrible shape, he was there, and I desperately needed someone to talk to in the moment. He had invited me out to coffee to help me decompress, and he chose to take action because I was in such shitty shape.
Obviously, that doesn't change what he said or the damage it dealt. He had his reasons for why he approached it that way, but they are deeply personal, and I don't want to betray his trust.
But to answer your question, he understands.
I just wonder what will happen next. There's still lingering tension, and I truly doubt Glitch gives a shit about how I feel or what I have to say, so we'll have to find a way to work around that. If we break into smaller teams, that will likely help, but I can't flip a switch and simply be happy about where things stand with us.
And then there's Drake. I know he wants little do with me as it presently stands.
It is what it is. Let's just hope tomorrow goes more smoothly than today. Though I wouldn't count on it.
[No, not with Ren and Magpie coming face to face, to unleash whatever unholy alchemy they might possess. And the team itself split both ways on protecting the two of them.]
[If it's ever over. Certainly for Frog it isn't going to be—at least, so he thinks.]
I imagine something bigger and badder is waiting for us. That's how it usually works, right?
I won't say you haven't learned harsh lessons today. But try to put them into practice. Two of you living in the past right now is more than I can handle. (^‿^)
There's always something bigger, yes. But this has been far more emotionally draining than facing gods. That's impersonal.
This is entirely personal.
I'll do what I can, but if Glitch tries anything, I will stand my ground. I will try to at least not be the aggressor, but I refuse to be a punching bag.
If Drake and Magpie are both on board, then I see no reason not to resume tomorrow. Same time, and obviously the same place.
Speaking of which, I know there have been problems between you and Drake. You only have to look at the Palace, it turns out. But he's chosen to count on you. Try to remember that.
If I go downstairs to find a lucky cat, I'll leave it to Morgana to deal with.
And I'm glad to hear that. I value your judgement, you know, as much as I did when I arrived. We're the only two here in our respective roles. Akechis, I mean.
True, but the differences between us are rather clear as well.
It's astonishing how you were able to keep a cool head throughout all of that. I like to think I'm typically better than that, but I suppose everything added together pushed me too far.
Then again, perhaps you haven't spent so long repressing anger.
[What Drake said about his mother was bad, but he's heard far, far worse.]
The whole problem is that half of us are defending some part of the team *from* the team. And I didn't keep control. Not really. I just kept quiet, which isn't the same.
Yes, that would put a wrench in things, but that's also why I put so much blame on myself. My contentious relationship with Glitch, my bond with Magpie... Remove all of it, and the friction goes away.
But that isn't possible. We must continue, and we will all have to tolerate each other to the best of our abilities.
I meant what I said about keeping a close eye on Magpie. It's not so much that I distrust him so much as Ren and I can understand him better due to the sheer amount of time we've spent under the same roof.
When you only see one side of someone, everything else disappears. With Glitch, it's because we were on friendly terms that it hurts so much. It's a different sort of anguish, I think.
She values Drake above all else, and I can't even fault her for it. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in the middle. And here you are, also stuck in the middle by virtue of having to coordinate everything.
Morgana and Ryuji are laughably tame by comparison.
Morgana and Ryuji aren't so bad. They figured a few things out in my timeline.
[Admittedly, it helped that they had a far bigger duck to fry.]
I trust you to guide Magpie. You do know him best, by far. But in the same way, unless Glitch is breaking ranks to attack a team member—[which Frog is convinced she won't do]—your confronting her will only make matters worse. It's my job to keep you out of the middle, after all.
But with her refusal to accept any apologies or attempts to make peace, I suppose I'll just have to bear the lingering tension. I know you can't force reconciliation, but it's so irksome when attempts to make amends fall short.
I certainly don't intend to confront her, however, and I trust that you will be able to keep her in line.
I appreciate your understanding. All things considered, you could have been much harsher.
What good would that have done? You're no fly to be caught with a bit of honey, but you deserve understanding just as much as anyone else here. And you can reach your own conclusions just as well.
If we could make everyone get along, I'd have done it beforehand. And one miracle tomorrow is more than I dare to hope for. [Drake and Magpie, of course.]
All things considered, it is rather miraculous. I was so worried that our conversation with Magpie would leave him hurt and ostracized, but we managed to reach an understanding despite some initial missteps.
Judging by our conversation, I think it'll be all right, and "all right" is better than abhorrent.
But I suppose we should both get some rest, if we're to be in top form tomorrow.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I was in terrible shape, he was there, and I desperately needed someone to talk to in the moment. He had invited me out to coffee to help me decompress, and he chose to take action because I was in such shitty shape.
Obviously, that doesn't change what he said or the damage it dealt. He had his reasons for why he approached it that way, but they are deeply personal, and I don't want to betray his trust.
But to answer your question, he understands.
I just wonder what will happen next. There's still lingering tension, and I truly doubt Glitch gives a shit about how I feel or what I have to say, so we'll have to find a way to work around that. If we break into smaller teams, that will likely help, but I can't flip a switch and simply be happy about where things stand with us.
And then there's Drake. I know he wants little do with me as it presently stands.
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[No, not with Ren and Magpie coming face to face, to unleash whatever unholy alchemy they might possess. And the team itself split both ways on protecting the two of them.]
Can I offer a word of advice?
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Very well.
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Try not to take all of this on yourself. It does no good. There's plenty of blame to go around.
[Including in his direction. But he doesn't elaborate.]
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But it's hard not to feel that way after today. Multiple chiming in to scold me. My own boyfriend wasn't thrilled.
Ren and I talked about it after the fact. We came to an understanding.
I'll just be happy when this is over.
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I imagine something bigger and badder is waiting for us. That's how it usually works, right?
I won't say you haven't learned harsh lessons today. But try to put them into practice. Two of you living in the past right now is more than I can handle. (^‿^)
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This is entirely personal.
I'll do what I can, but if Glitch tries anything, I will stand my ground. I will try to at least not be the aggressor, but I refuse to be a punching bag.
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I'm going to do my best to keep her in line. And everyone else. But if you all start fighting with each other, we may as well stay home.
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I certainly don't intend to let it reach that point.
I suppose the question is how soon we're resuming. I assume tomorrow, and I can imagine we'll want to give ourselves most of the day.
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Speaking of which, I know there have been problems between you and Drake. You only have to look at the Palace, it turns out. But he's chosen to count on you. Try to remember that.
[In other words, don't blow it.]
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To that end, I'll give it everything that I can. It's all I really can do.
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[And, hopefully, that really is it for the lectures.]
When this is done, we should do something together. Coffee, perhaps. Maybe not at the home of the Lucky Cat.
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Leblanc? Suddenly there's a lucky cat statue intruding on Morgana's territory.
But I'm not opposed. To the coffee, that is.
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And I'm glad to hear that. I value your judgement, you know, as much as I did when I arrived. We're the only two here in our respective roles. Akechis, I mean.
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It's astonishing how you were able to keep a cool head throughout all of that. I like to think I'm typically better than that, but I suppose everything added together pushed me too far.
Then again, perhaps you haven't spent so long repressing anger.
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[What Drake said about his mother was bad, but he's heard far, far worse.]
The whole problem is that half of us are defending some part of the team *from* the team. And I didn't keep control. Not really. I just kept quiet, which isn't the same.
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But that isn't possible. We must continue, and we will all have to tolerate each other to the best of our abilities.
I meant what I said about keeping a close eye on Magpie. It's not so much that I distrust him so much as Ren and I can understand him better due to the sheer amount of time we've spent under the same roof.
When you only see one side of someone, everything else disappears. With Glitch, it's because we were on friendly terms that it hurts so much. It's a different sort of anguish, I think.
She values Drake above all else, and I can't even fault her for it. Meanwhile, I'm stuck in the middle. And here you are, also stuck in the middle by virtue of having to coordinate everything.
Morgana and Ryuji are laughably tame by comparison.
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[Admittedly, it helped that they had a far bigger duck to fry.]
I trust you to guide Magpie. You do know him best, by far. But in the same way, unless Glitch is breaking ranks to attack a team member—[which Frog is convinced she won't do]—your confronting her will only make matters worse. It's my job to keep you out of the middle, after all.
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But with her refusal to accept any apologies or attempts to make peace, I suppose I'll just have to bear the lingering tension. I know you can't force reconciliation, but it's so irksome when attempts to make amends fall short.
I certainly don't intend to confront her, however, and I trust that you will be able to keep her in line.
I appreciate your understanding. All things considered, you could have been much harsher.
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If we could make everyone get along, I'd have done it beforehand. And one miracle tomorrow is more than I dare to hope for. [Drake and Magpie, of course.]
In the end, Glitch will take her lead from Drake.
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Judging by our conversation, I think it'll be all right, and "all right" is better than abhorrent.
But I suppose we should both get some rest, if we're to be in top form tomorrow.
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Stay on guard tomorrow. I'm counting on you.
[A little manipulative? Sure. But it's also true.]